Today I was on leave because Joshua's teacher was coming over to discuss his first semester evaluation. I had asked her to include him in the mock interviews in preparation for the big schools. I had also been feeling under the weather which I think is my annual flu -- I only get sick once a year, usually when my birthday's coming up. Weird, huh?
Nevertheless, I felt ok enough to bring Josh to school and do the groceries before picking him up. I decided to do the non-working mom thingy today and brought Faith with me without the yaya. So, dropped Josh at school and by 9am, Faith and I were happily cruising the aisles at the supermarket. Since Joshua wouldn't be off till 11:45 and we finished grocery shopping at 10, we hung out at Starbucks, me settling with my frapuccino and Faith sucking on a lollipop.
I loved it. I realized this is what my life will be like if I were a housewife (albeit with more chores, I know). I could tell the kids loved it too. Joshua was so happy I was bringing him to school and proudly announced to his teacher that his mommy was here! I loved cruising leisurely in the supermarket with Faith perched on the cart, mindlessly talking to each other about whether she wanted the chocolate milk with the cow or if she could open the package of cookies and eat it. It was a far cry from my usual mad dash through the market, anxious to finish the shopping in 30 minutes. In Starbucks, she just sat on my lap, licking her lolly, telling me that the guard outside looked sad. By 11:15, we were back in Joshua's school and Faith joined her kuya's class while they were doing art. I chatted with a dad who, like me, was waiting for his daughter Jiana (Josh's classmate). Only, unlike me, he seemed to be a familiar fixture in the school.
So I'm sure you can tell what I'm wishing for right now. I'm tired of getting up in the morning to get dressed for work. Tired of arriving home at 9pm, with only an hour with the kids before bedtime. This is why, I treasure the weekends so much, forgoing the chores that I feel need to be done so I can just play with the kids and do normal everyday stuff with them.
Yeah, really feeling the guilt here.
Joshua's doing well and teacher feels he's ready to try for the big school! Yippee!